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You may have inferred from the previous entry that the company doesn’t issue corporate credit cards. Employees whose job requires traveling put their business-related charges on their own credit cards, except for plane fare, then they submit expense reports for reimbursement.

Before I began traveling for work, I applied for a credit card at my bank, but was rejected with the box checked for “Insufficient Income.” I still have the rejection letter somewhere. Until I could manage to get a card, the company issued me cash advances for my trips, that I then turned into American Express traveler’s checks. (“Don’t Leave Home Without Them,” as Karl Malden used to say in the TV ads.)

I was eventually approved for a Mastercard thanks to the wife of my boss’ boss, who was an executive at my bank. When I reapplied for a card, I had to sign a form agreeing to use it only for work-related expenses, and she processed the approval. Eventually, I was able to use the card for myself, and I still have that account. About fifteen years ago, I was gobsmacked to learn that the wife had become good friends with my high school girlfriend. But I digress.

So there I was, meeting with the administrator who would explain the process involved with firing Ted for his attempted fraud. Ted would receive a check for the valid charges from his trip to Canada, along with a final paycheck, pro-rated for however many days he had been employed that month. I was relieved to hear the police wouldn’t be involved. How wrong I was.

When I met with Ted he gave me the same innocent routine he had before, when he was put on probation. He didn’t understand, there must be a mistake, it had to be a misunderstanding, etc. But he’d been caught, and he couldn’t talk his way out of the situation he was in. After the exit interview, Ted was escorted out of the building by the administrator.

A couple of weeks later, I received a phone call at work. It went something like this:

“Mr. Pratt? Douglas Pratt?”
“Yes.”
“I’m Sergeant (so and so) of the Massachusetts Port Authority Police Department^*.”
“Uh, yes?”
“Does Ted [name withheld] work for you?”
“He did.”
“He gave your name as his boss.”
“I was, but he was fired for submitting a fraudulent expense report.”
“I see. Have you had any contact with him since then?”
“No, none. Why?”
“An associate of his was working for a car rental company at Logan Airport.”
“Yeah, that figures.”
“They have taken a vehicle and disappeared.”

Holy crud. Ted had gone from being disciplined for chronic tardiness and his failure to report for work without notice, to grand theft auto. I took the officer’s name and number and I promised to call him if Ted contacted me, but I couldn’t imagine why he would do that. I assumed that would be the last I’d even hear about Ted, let alone hear from him or see him again. How wrong I was.

^* Formerly an independent force, the Massport Police later became a unit of the Massachusetts State Police.

On my aforementioned business trip to England, I was an experienced UK driver. My first time in England I drove from Gatwick to the Midlands while feeling very jet-lagged behind the wheel on the “wrong” side of an Austin. I narrowly avoided having an accident on a roundabout, but somehow I adjusted and arrived safely at my destination. By the time of that later trip, being stuck on the M25 motorway felt the same to me as Route 128 traffic did outside of Boston.

It was the first trip to England for my very lovely traveling companion, so I rented the car and did almost all of the driving. She wanted to give it a try, and we had fun with her practicing around the village, near the inn where we were staying.

Several years earlier, Ted had returned from his site visit to Canada. He submitted his expense report and worked on his site report. Ted’s car rental was for at least several hundred dollars, I don’t remember the amount, but the contract/receipt didn’t look quite right for Canada. My little internal warning bell began to ring again. Given the circumstances of Ted’s probation, I didn’t question him. Rather, I dutifully completed my review of Ted’s expense report and forwarded it to Accounting, with a note questioning the car rental receipt.

Some days later, Accounting called me. I was told they had an expense report from someone else for that same week. They called her and she explained that, as the senior employee, she had rented the car and did all of the driving, with Ted as a passenger. The rental agency was contacted, and the serial number on Ted’s agreement was traced to their counter at Logan Airport. Ted’s receipt was an inside job, being both genuine and fraudulent.

The news hit me hard. That was it for Ted. He had attempted to defraud the company, and in turn the customer. I didn’t know exactly how he got hold of an official, properly printed receipt, but Ted had to be fired immediately. I went to my boss’ office, closed the door, and explained the situation. He called the administrator who had provided us with the probation form that Ted signed, and we waited for him to come over and advise me on the termination process.

PART II: Lo and Behold, Ted got back on track right away. As far as I could tell, his private life was no longer interfering with his work. Yay! What a relief. I would have been very reluctant to terminate Ted’s employment on the basis of the hours he kept. I am a night owl myself, and not a natural early riser.

As I mentioned in an earlier installment, members of my group rarely traveled with another employee. We’d finish an installation and move on to another. With e-mail not yet being an option, further contact with customers was limited to the phone and, later, an occasional fax. We’d jump between airlines, depending on the destination, making it difficult to accumulate redeemable frequent flyer miles.

This contrasted with the consultants who followed us, who would return to a site again and again. They were able to build relationships with customers while collecting frequent flyer miles they were allowed to keep, rather than turning over to the company.

Ted went on a site visit to do software installation in Canada. I made many trips to Canada myself, and two years ago I wrote about one of them. (A passport wasn’t yet needed to cross the Canadian border.)

Bonners Ferry ’88

On one of my business trips to England, a group of consultants I was supposed to meet at the Logan international terminal turned out to be one woman. She was a gorgeous, very smart and capable professional, with an engaging personality. Although I assure you nothing happened, I have rarely enjoyed the casual company of a woman as much as I did with her that week.

When Ted left for Canada, I didn’t know that he was traveling with a woman who was a consultant in another group. Based on my week in England, along with that alleged pass a woman made at another woman, I might have been understanding (retroactively) if Ted’s resulting trouble was what you’re thinking. I promise you it came from an entirely different direction.

There came a day when Ted was a total no-show. It may have been a day other than Friday by that point. That’s a bit of detail I don’t recall. I gave up waiting for Ted and I called his apartment (no cellphones in 1987). His roommate said Ted wasn’t there, and he didn’t know where Ted was. I told him that if he heard from Ted, he had to get to the office ASAP.

Meeting with my boss, he said enough was enough, and that Ted needed to be put on probation. There was a formal process for doing that, and we met with the manager in charge of personnel-related matters, who gave us a form that Ted would have to sign.

When Ted finally showed up that afternoon, I sat with him for a very uncomfortable meeting, to find out what happened. He came up with an excuse that I was forced to at least consider might be true.

Ted claimed he didn’t come to work, and wasn’t at his apartment when I called, because he’d been with his parents, whose house had been defaced with a racial slur. He didn’t have an answer when I asked him why he hadn’t left a message for me. I told Ted that I used to be a reporter, and I knew that if what he said was true, it would definitely be a top story on the news that night.

Given the serious nature of Ted’s claim, he had to be given the benefit of the doubt, but there was nothing on the news that night or in the Boston Globe the next day, about a house being defaced with a racial slur. So I was left with no choice but to have Ted sign the probation form.

Ted seemed genuinely surprised and hurt. I sincerely liked Ted, and I wanted him to succeed. I felt bad making him sign a document acknowledging if there was any more trouble he could be fired.

Everything I’ve said so far is merely context to ensure a full appreciation of the upcoming plot twists. Consider this post to be the end of Part I.